Chronically Sleep Deprived

We've been back for a few weeks now. The first two weeks were crazy. No one was sleeping well or often, and we were just coping and trying to get adjusted to the time change. We're doing better now. Trea is loving all of her cousins and nursery friends, and all the other little kids in the neighborhood. We had a great time traveling with John's parents before returning to the States. It was fun to show them why we love Thailand. This Halloween was Trea's first time trick-or-treating. She got the hang of it really fast, and kept saying things like "I have lots of candy" and "go get candy? go to houses? go to lots of houses?" I think she thinks we've been holding out on her this entire time. People will give you candy, all you have to do is put on a dress and knock! Who knew? We are excited to see everyone near us; we'll be in touch with y'all soon. And, of course, pictures of my beautiful girl in her Halloween costume. Aunt Ashley made it ...

Living in Thailand as a farang has given me a small taste of what it is like to be a minority. I don't claim that it is the same as being a minority in the States, but there are some similarities. It’s odd to not be able to find hair products that work for fine hair (Thai hair is coarse) or a facial product without bleach. It's hard to get a decent haircut, because the techniques are different. All the cosmetics are the wrong colors for my skin. Clothes are too small; only a handful of stores carry my size -I’m a ten in the U.S. - and even then the clothes are cut all wrong for me. If you’re Thai and my size, you’re really fat. The shirts that button comfortably on me are also baggy around my waist, and the pants that fit me through the hips need a belt to stay up. We get stared at wherever we go. Many people assume we are rich and don't speak Thai (which is true for me but not for John, and even I can sometimes understand that you are talking about me). People have asked u...

Today is my fifth wedding anniversary. That's crazy. We went out and did a little shopping and had a nice dinner to celebrate. I wonder if in 20 years, I'll still feel like I just got married?

Yesterday I had a woman tell me I look 19. She wanted to know how old I actually am; I guess I threw her for a loop talking about my (almost) three-year-old. I get a lot of these oh-you-look-so-young kind of comments. I used to hate it, especially when I was working full time. I hated that how I looked might make people perceive me as less professional or less competent, and I had more than one supervisor/co-worker try to treat me like their child. One of my bosses actually sat John down at an office party and gave him the third degree about his future work plans. It was funny, in a way, and also weird. John resisted the urge to tell him that 1) he wasn't my father and 2) we were already married, so it was too late to change my mind. The comment yesterday didn't bother me a bit. Somehow the fact that I'm almost 28 with two kids is making me more receptive to being perceived as young. Funny how things change.

I’m a fairly independent person. Not extremely independent, but I’m certainly capable of doing things on my own. At least in the U.S. I am. Here, I am not as independent, and what independence I have involves far more effort. This is all because of the language barrier. My last post notwithstanding, my Thai is extremely limited. I can have an entire conversation about my kids, because I've heard it all many times, but outside of that topic I'm pretty useless. And my pronunciation, while improved, is still not that good. I didn’t realize how limiting not speaking the language would be until I was on study abroad here as a student in 2001. I had already been to Guatemala at that point, but at least in Guatemala I spoke a little of the language (though not as well as you might think after four years of studying it. . .I did get proposed to so I must have said something interesting!) It is VERY limiting to not speak the language here. If I can’t find an item I’m looking for in a s...

The impossible has happened. I have been complimented on my Thai . Not once, but FOUR times! The first time, it was a total stranger. He stopped to admire Adia (totally cute baby that she is), and said, in English, "Lady or. . . .?" So I responded in Thai, "Girl." He said, "Where are you going?" I said, "The university." And he said, "Oh you speak Thai really well." As I have said before, it doesn't take much to impress Thais with your efforts to speak their language. The second time, I was asking my neighbor if I could buy some water (she gets it delivered in bulk, and we buy it from her). Her daughter, who speaks fluent English, was very impressed that I had learned how to say "buy water" since she had last visited. The third time, Jick complimented me on my pronunciation when I said "we're going home." The fourth time, Earn told John I was starting to understand a lot more. So, you see, give me fourteen mo...

We finally blessed Adia last Sunday. We had a dress made for her from Thai silk (which sounds extravagant but cost less then I would have spent making it in the States). It actually isn't exactly what I described but it's still really cute. I would have done the sewing myself, but I don't have a machine and they don't sell patterns here. Also, she cut her first tooth. Bottom front, others shortly to follow I'm sure.

I cooked a lot this weekend. I made chicken and mashed potatoes for dinner Sunday night, plus I made two no-bake cheesecakes (not the cheesecakes my friend Ariana referred to in a comment, but still very tasty). I miss having a real kitchen. I miss having an oven, and all the things you can do with an oven - roast, broil, bake. I miss counter space, and cabinets. I miss having a real, full-size refrigerator and freezer (my refrigerator is shorter than I am, and has a little freezer compartment). It makes it hard to keep an adequate supply of food on hand. Most of all, I miss having an enclosed kitchen that is really part of the house. Our kitchen, as I believe I have mentioned before, is an afterthought. You go out the back door into the little lean-to type room that is my kitchen. It's tiny. There's open space between the top of the outside wall and the roof. We have a loose wire grill over the open space now, which keeps out the birds, frogs, etc. (which keeps them from poopi...

I think this will be a new (and short-lived) series for my blog. It will probably sound like I don't like it here, which is not true. I do like Thailand. Sometimes I love Thailand and wish we weren't going home. And at other times, I wish we were leaving tomorrow. One of the things I am really, really looking forward to in the U.S. is hot water. We have a little electric hot water heater in the upstairs shower, but that's the only hot water in the house. And unless it's a warm day, the water doesn't get that hot. In the cool season, the water barely gets past lukewarm, and the house is 60 degrees. Not fun, especially for little kids. I'm really looking forward to a long hot shower on a chilly evening, or soaking in a tub full of hot water. And then there's the hot water from the tap. The only time I wash dishes in hot water is when I boil it on the stove. It's going to be so nice to just turn on a tap and get hot water to wash dishes. (Even better, we mi...

I'm almost done with my first (and, for the immediate future, last) semester of teaching college. I like it. It suits me far better than teaching kindergarten. I am fascinated by the English language, and the process of learning language, and I love the challenge of trying to help others master it. Or at least learn to pronounce words ending in "l." I have realized that there is an entirely different expectation of college students here. I felt, as a college student, that I was an adult, and most of my instructors treated me as one. College students here are still treated like children most of the time. My boss addresses the students as "children" even though I have several students in their early 20s. They don't schedule their own classes; you pick a major, and the university tells you what you will take and when. They don't get homework, unless it's reading, because they "won't do it anyway." It's frustrating to be trying to finis...

My sister Erin tagged me. . .so here goes. 4 Jobs I've Had Server Executive Assistant Test Development Coordinator English teacher 4 Movies I Love: Armageddon What Dreams May Come The Princess Bride Beauty and the Beast 4 Places I've Lived: Maryland Provo, Utah Salt Lake City, Utah Thailand 4 TV Shows I Love: Grey's Anatomy The West Wing (we've been watching it on DVD) Lost House 4 Things that Make Me Happy: My family Good books Baking Traveling 4 Books I Love: The Shadow of the Wind Ender's Game The Bonesetter's Daughter Harry Potter 4 Foods I Love cheesecake chocolate chip cookies chicken fettucine alfredo baked ziti 4 Vacations I Love: The Beach Visiting Family anywhere I can get a massage anywhere Trea has fun I'd Rather Be: sleeping 2 People to tag: Ariana John

We're coming home in October. We have tickets and today John told his boss. We wanted to give plenty of notice, since it's not easy finding farang teachers. I will tell my boss this afternoon. I'm a little overwhelmed by the idea of having to totally re-establish a household, but excited too. John's parents are coming and we are going to travel with them for ten days before heading back to the U.S. We will be staying with them for the holidays, and using that time to figure out where we want to settle. I'm going to try to blog a lot in the next couple of months so I can get in all my thoughts about Thailand, but I doubt I'll be able to get it all down. Also, check out John's blog for a link to our family snapshots online. Lots of cute ones!

Trea is pretty much potty trained. I say "pretty much" because she's had one accident (in the middle of a tirade) in the last week or so, and she wears underwear all day. She's still wearing a pull up for naps and at night, mostly because we co-sleep and can't deal with the idea of nighttime accidents getting all four of us up! She's growing up so fast. . . .

Dear Student, Cheating is not allowed in my class. It's wrong, it's unfair, it circumvents the learning process. . . it's just a bad thing to do. Plagiarism , copying, getting answers in advance of a quiz, these are all forms of cheating. Please don't do them. If you are going to cheat, please be subtle about it. Passing your quiz paper to your friend across the aisle from you WHILE I AM LOOKING AT YOU is not subtle. Coming into a listening quiz that's half over and scoring a 9/10 on the first half of the quiz - the part you DIDN'T HEAR - is not subtle (and no, I don't believe you are just a lucky guesser and you're still not getting the points). When I give you a writing assignment for homework, don't plagiarize the encyclopedia. Since you can't normally conjugate the past tense (of any verb), it's pretty obvious you copied when you start using words like "undulating" and "topography." It's also not a good idea to us...

Or, more accurately, “cautiously navigating the narrow and crowded sois.” But “conquering the open roads” sounds better. I’ve learned to drive in Thailand. It’s strange, with the whole driving-on-the-left thing. Also because I think traffic laws in Thailand are a lot like the pirate’s code in Pirates of the Caribbean – they’re more like guidelines than actual rules. Consider the following: - If you are turning right, you yield the right-of-way to oncoming traffic. Unless you can jump the light faster than the oncoming traffic. Or unless there’s a gap of at least one meter, and you can intimidate oncoming traffic into stopping. Then you and the five cars behind you can all turn right. - Traffic in a traffic circle moves clockwise. Unless you are a motorcycle, or you don’t see any traffic coming, or you see traffic coming but *think* you can make it in and out of the traffic circle without a collision. - Turn signals and headlights are primarily for decoration. Especially headlights, alt...

Yesterday Adia was lying on our bed, and Trea walked over to her and started slapping her hand. "Trea!" I said. "Don't hit Adia!" Trea looked at me with these big, innocent eyes and said, "I'm giving Adia high fives." Oh. Well. In that case, since Adia seems to think it's funny. . . .carry on.

Been really busy lately. I'm teaching part-time at two different universities, and really enjoying it most of the time. There's still the occasional student antic that drives me batty, but far fewer than the kindergarteners (who somehow are so much cuter when I say hi to them at school now, than they were when I was with them all day!). John is enjoying teaching kindergarten. Still not his dream job, but a much better fit than the fourth graders from you-know-where that he taught last year. I'm finding that I really love teaching, and I love the English language. It's fascinating to me that most people master such a complex communication system with minimal effort. I'm not a naturally gifted language teacher, but I'm ok, and I think I could be really good with experience and practice. I teach a variety of majors at KKU, but at Rajamangala I teach English majors. I prefer the English majors as a group, because they're really motivated, but I have some great s...

A good friend of mine recently found out she is expecting her second child. She's excited, and scared, and wondering, I think, how this new little person will fit in her family. It seemed inappropriate to leave a novel as a comment on her blog, but this is MY blog so I can do what I want. I think all mothers, when they find out they are pregnant with a second child, wonder if they can possibly love this second one like they do their firstborn. Because your firstborn is the only person you've ever felt that incredibly protective, mama-tiger type love for. It's a totally different love than what you feel for your parents, or your spouse, or anyone else. And the truth, for me, is that on the day Adia was born I didn't feel the same about her as I did about Trea. But I was comparing my feelings for a newborn with the relationship I had with my two-and-a-half year old, who talks, and whom I know. Within 24 hours I started to know Adia as well, and within two days I realized ...

A little girl we knew died two months ago. She passed away from leukemia ten days after Adia was born. I saw Praew and her mom at the hospital the day I gave birth to Adia, but John wasn’t with me and I don’t speak Thai, so we just exchanged greetings. I didn’t realize how sick she was. She’d been sick since before we knew her, and we never heard that she was really getting worse. John just came home one day and said she had died. She was nine. Her mom, Teacher Mam, was one of Trea’s nursery teachers when we moved her, and her sister lives across the street. The two of them have helped us with Trea so many times. Now, they take care of the infants and toddlers. I had to leave Adia for a few hours last week to go teach. Teacher Mam and I were alone in the room, and I was nursing Adia. I asked how she was; she responded, but I didn’t understand it. I caught her daughter’s name but that was the only word I understood. A few minutes later another teacher came, and Teacher Mam repeated what...

Just so all of you bloggers know, your blogs are being blocked in Thailand. We lost access to all blogs hosted by blogspot a couple of weeks ago - couldn't get to them at home, school, nada. But, John has found a way around the censors. Ha! Take that, oppressive regime! It's weird to think that I live in a country where these things happen but I guess that is life under a military junta.